... the other woman ...

I have become the other woman ...

Whose arms you can only sneak to when the sun has set ...

When no one can see ...

The one you can only spend stolen time - sharing stolen kisses with.

I sincerely wish ours was a different story ...

But I can't turn back time.

With every moment I spend with you ...

For every half hearted and rushed 'I've Missed You' hug I get ...

And for every time you give me a hurried goodnight kiss ...

I foolishly let a piece of my heart go ... to waste.

I don't want to spoil what you already have ...

For what could have been ...

I'm only as strong as you will allow me to be ...

If you will let me go.

You say you pray for me to find mine ...

But, how can I??!

When I'm too busy satisfying my thirst ...

At a well I have no right to?

If you were single (and free),

I wouldn't have given this a second thought ...

I woulda jumped right in!

You have changed me so much,

I can't even remember what the old me felt like.

Before I spin outta control, help me ...

With a reality check.

Let's return to life as we knew it ...

Before we met.

Romance with Words 2 ... What Say You?

Lo, heart's in haste

Affections hung on absolute chaste

Your presence I wish I could paste

Your absence my linguals taste

Hope nature will find a way to surcharge

That my vivid thoughts of you I can recharge

My memories' stuck on you

As being taken by voodoo

But words only try to froth

How the soul cry for the tear

That trickle can't be shred

By the line that pickle

So, the poet lies in a befuddle

As letters fail to grasp

Glut of a cuddle 'cos its nit within

If its report can't erupt seething

Of what use then are words that turn not

World's shame to the poets

Infamy to the composer of sonnets

Woe to he that glistens

Fooled is she that listens

Will I believe all you say hither?

When your actions prove dither?

My Romance ... With Words

*edited post*

I read/heard somewhere that women are turned on by what they hear and men, by what they see (like that is news?!!?). I think know now that I don't (completely) belong to the class of human beings called 'women'. Reason? I'm (totally!) turned on by what I read – words. The fastest route to my heart ... Written Words! Remember my first and only love? Well, we started ... and ended L ... with words. The very words that held us together ... the (very true) words that were the foundation of our love ... Enjoy...

*Note: My words in Purple, my thoughts in Green and his words in Blue.

05-02-08

6.51am

What am I doing awake? It is definitely not the movie but can it be him? It can't be. Really! We just met like what - some days ago? And here I am feeling like this! He's dropping hints now; but when he comes all out, what do I say then? Honestly minus sentiments, all that emotional constipation and stuff, can this be for real? Things are moving too fast and besides the odds are not in my favour.

HE?

He is Ok. Makes me smile laugh! There is always something to say. I didn't ask it to be like this, I didn't force it this time around, it just came – honest! Am I sure?! I dunno. But, he IS ok. Have I always wanted Ok or do I suddenly do? Geez! He's not all that but then ... He's the first - and I really do mean first that does not want the same ol' same ol' stuff - of course I dig!

The rate at which things are going, it could be anytime soon. Then what am I going to do? Someone once said 'if you have just one chance to be happy, grab it before it passes away'. What if I end up losing? What if I may not even be happy from the onset? What if he is for real? And I let him go? Geez! I don't know!

Heart in Shreds

6^th February 2010

2.24pm

In my short life, I've truly fallen in love just once. My happiness was short lived though. My folks said NO! and made us break up. I tried to get back with him when I was in Las Gidi and we've been in touch since then ... I stupidly thought we were back on track - after just one night.

Big Mistake! I called to arrange another rendezvous recently and you coulda knocked me over with a feather from my shock at his response. He said he could not make it ... that he was on his honeymoon! L

I'm hurting seriously. I have no one to call mine and my seemingly eternal loneliness has really started affected my reasoning. All I need is someone to hold me through this storm that has become my life. *sob sob* Is that too much to ask for?! My heart and my eyes are tired of weeping. I never really tried loving anyone again ever since my first (and only time) ... Where's the encouragement to?!?!?

But I really wanna know ... what is my offence?! Loving someone?! I don't get it! Am I a victim of his personal vendetta? I did him no wrong ... unless loving him too damn much has become a crime. I was a helpless pawn in the drama that surrounded our break up. Ok, I admit, I was spineless ... I could not even as much as raise a finger in our defence but really ... could I have fought both my parents?!? Methinks he has a share of the blame too ... I was not the only coward ... what attempt did he make to save our love?! The only image I had of him was of a dog running away with its tail in between ... what happened to being a man? Ehn?

The pain is ... oh Gawd! I was gasping for breath even hours after I got his 'turn-her-down' text. I could only scream into my pillow ... and hold myself to (miserable) sleep. Funny thing is I'm not sure I've got anyone that can really relate to my situation ... I had no one to call... My best girlfriends?! Both of 'em were asleep at the time ... Ironic, innit? I've never been asleep whenever they needed me...*sigh*

Like a' said, my 'tears stream' has run outta supply... If I'd known that it would hurt this much ... that what I felt was still as intense ... I'd never had opened my door that night. Now, my heart is cold ... stone hard ... broken ... in shreds...

Yours ... in Pain,

P. Streak

Diary of A Randy Spinster

Dear Diary,

This weekend … I was rather naughty – I admit. I'd been in my hotel room since midweek and the loneliness was suffocating! I called up my ex-boyfriend and boy! was it one night to remember. After much talk – we still had some issues to clear as regards our breakup … we got down to business. He kissed me … just like I remembered. He touched me with such eternal patience … I wondered if anything had changed. He held me … the exact way I loved to be held. He lulled me to sleep and then … watched me sleep. We shared our deepest thoughts and emotions and tears … for what coulda been. And then – the morning after … it was time to say goodbye. I had cried all my 'goodbye' tears a long time ago ... So, with a very strong sense of finality, I shut the door ... It was time for my heart to let go too …

Later – that evening, I shared my weekend with ma two best girlfriends. Only one comment stuck from our all 'girl talk' that day. My girlfriend said to me... 'You are just randy!' While my jaw almost dropped to the floor, I found it hard to put in one word in my defence. I could only ask my conscience ... Am I really randy?

In my closet now, I can speak up...

I find it hard to let go of my old flame. With him, I think – for the first and only time, I felt that alien emotion called love. Then, I could actually say those legendary three words and not laugh later at how stupid I'd sounded. I could be completely myself without fear of just being tolerated. He was the only one I could confide in of my every fear, insecurities, gossip ... he knew my every thought. He was my twin ... my best friend ... my brother ... my everything ... He knew me ... even much more than I knew myself ... that sometimes, it was just plain scary. Yeah, like everyone, he was not perfect – neither was I. He had his shortcomings but for the consuming emotion I felt ... I was ready to compromise. And then, it happened...

My parents said NO! and I couldn't fight them ... or defend our love. It was undeniably one of the most awful moments of my life ... I lost weight terribly ... depression became my middle name ... I lost focus ... I lost that light in my eyes ... I'd lost a vital part of me. From his end, it had seemed to me like he got over me real quickly ... now, a' realize that withdrawal was just his own way of recovery... On that night, I discovered that neither one of us had really gotten over us... We'd talked though ... about how getting back together would NOT! work out ... *sigh* I wanna rekindle ma old flame ... could that be my heart talking? ... or, just me being randy?!?!?!

p.s. This new blog template is dedicated to my two best girlfriends. With these two, I can totally be myself ... and THAT is the true meaning of friendship – freedom ... to be (totally) you! Love you lots, ma gurls. Chocolate Kisses.

p.p.s. My dear readers, the links above don't work L So, please, just try to ignore them, k? xoxo

Lip Smacking … Forbidden!

Ok. So, this post got its original title stolen by My First Purple Script but as far as eye-catching post titles go, I try with this new one, huh? *wink wink* So what exactly is lip-smacking good but so forbidden, it hurts just to have your mouth water? Help! Married men can’t seem to help being attracted to me! Seriously! Full gist …

Like I said in my first script, I’ve been doing some serious retrospection lately and came up with the following:

§ I haven’t had a serious relationship since … forever! Jeez man! That’s scary, innit?! By a serious relationship, I mean serious serious … like 1 year+ kinda serious. Yeah, it gives me the chills – and sleepless nights atimes, but hey! What should I do naa? Put up an ‘I’m Available’ billboard?! Funny enough, I once pulled that kinda stunt on FB and guess how many returns it yielded? 0! L

Anyways, I don’t fink there’s anything I can do bout that so; I always like to think … ‘Their loss’. Yeah right.

§ I always seem to be attracted to the wrong people … more on this in coming posts.

§ What’s with me and married men sef?! Ehn?!

I’m presently on the third guy (and counting) now! And by ‘on the third guy’, I mean … oh! get ur mind outta the gutter! The funny thing is I find myself feeling their vibes too … ‘especially this third guy! Man! He’z hawt! ... at least, for a married guy. I find myself doing most of the calling (just to say hi, just to hear his voice), sending texts (just to wish him a great day) and thinkin’ about the dude 25/7! No, I didn’t come on to him … we sorta came on to each other, seriously. That’s unlike Married Guys #1 and #2 … who I eventually started feeling.

So, this third guy, the chemistry was instant and it was a case of sparks-at-first-sight! Initially, I had to form and caution myself cuz he’s ma boss (as in Boss Boss!) and I ain’t a fan of Office Romance much less ‘Oga-Junior Staff’ Romance! And then, I started going with his flow, hiding behind the shield of distance. I was like ‘We can’t exactly date with so much physical distance between us …’ Then, the Voice of Caution spoke … ‘Brakes!’ … and I had to create some emotional distance … L

Yeah, I know it’s wrong, karma and all, but what am I s’pposed to do? Ehn? Shoo them off?! Hey! I don’t get toasted on the regular; shouldn’t I at least enjoy the attention – while it lasts?!? I don’t let it go too far, I promise – at least, I try … hey! I gats a conscience. But, it does get far most times. Like when I first told Married Guy #3 …

P. Streak: Hey, I can’t date you.

M. G. #3: Why not?

P. Streak: You are off limits … you are married.

M. G. #3: So, are you saying you woulda considered me if I wasn’t?!

Smart Ass!

Married Guy #1 was (almost) that smart but I was (way) ahead. Went through his phone once and saw that I wasn’t the only one he was ‘hopelessly in love with’ – his words, not mine. Yeah right. And besides, he had such bad MO! that that first kiss became the one and only in a space of seconds! As for Married Guy #2, he is sooo on-again, off-again, it’s crazy! The oaf is particularly off-again when he’s with family, which reminds me of the title I’ve become … The Other Woman. Ouch!

This is another reason I’m not too keen on dating married men. I gats a conscience and it’s not even something I should be proud of. What’s the way out of this my dilemma sef? Can’t we just be good friends? Who am I lying to? We both know we don’t want that …

My Dear Married Man, I can’t give what you want.

Single Men, would you bring your desired butts over here?!?!

Deliciously Not!

My world of today is fraught with a gazillion misconceptions especially for young ladies like myself who are just starting life that sometimes, *sigh* I'm not so sure of what is really really right and what is really really (really!) wrong. There goes (or shall I say 'went'?) ma furst misconception … Did you catch it?! Sheesh! Guess not? For you that wasn't really paying attention … 'What is wrong? and What IS really really really wrong?!?!' Now you see what I'm talking about, huh?

Recently, a' been viewing ma life in retrospect and honestly, more than 75%! were not such a pretty sight. I blame no one but maself, honestly, but most times, I have also thought … 'Hey! It really ain't all o' me that makes me, ya? 'They' have a share of za blame(s) too, innit?! I mean, I am what I am today not of my own sole input …' U catch ma drift? Please say you do? …

I really hope my teaser's got you started – and hooked! Please say yes!

Hi, my (pen) name is Purple Streak and, yes!, I wish to remain anonymous for as long as I possibly can! This is ma renewed blog and I really hope I remain faithful this time. This time around, I really wanna retrace ma steps backs to ma furst lurv – writing. A' really luv'd writing as a kid – hadta pick it over drawing! Eventually, my writing stopped looking like a last resort, a helpless choice and started looking more like an escape route, my own new world!

More to come …

That said, let's get this show on the road!